So...speaking of her babies, she has five. As far as I'm concerned, they're all the same. Their faces look alike, but they are all different sizes and they do different things. Some cry, some laugh, some drink "milk," but they all hang with Avery...
They watch Spongebob with her (of which she's pointing to) and let's be very clear on this. She is OBSESSED with the babies...and them being in order, next to each other, and under certain blankies....
And here are the babies in bed...
This was because Avery was extremely deliberate about the whole thing. Which baby went where. Which baby was next to the other. Which baby went where. Which blankie went first. It's obsessive.
And these are the cute moments...
Now here are the messy goofy times...
Here you will take notice of the fashion statement that is Avery. Every day I say, "Avery, what do you want to wear?" And after 20 minutes of looking and picking then changing her mind, she always settles on some sort of jacket (no shirt) and mismatched pants. If I knew that we were going out, I'd force her into something tolerable and deal with the tears, but hey, who are we kidding? If we're not going anywhere...who cares?! Plus, it's always fun to watch her run around looking silly! Speaking of which - can you tell that she had a war with some Greek yogurt? Guess who won?
Once she's full, we begin the "Where is Avery?" process. Typically it begins without my knowledge. In my mind we are hanging out in the family room watching Cinderella, and Avery is running up to bouncy balls and jumping on them, launching herself onto another trajectory that always ends with laughter, or throwing herself (repeatedly) onto a bean bag for fun, or chasing the dogs all over the house yelling, "I'm fast!!!" When I least expect it, I hear it. Usually from somewhere close by. And it usually takes a minute for me to decipher what she's saying. Here's the phonetic version of what I hear first:
Avery: Inhidiinhrrrr.
Me: (Did she just say something or was that a burp?)
Avery: HEEHEEHEEHEEHEEEEEE...
Me: Wait a minute...where's Avery? I haven't seen her in forever (Avery...AHHHH!) Morgan, have you seen Avery anywhere?
Avery: (translated) I'm hiding here!
Morgan: Yeah, Mommy, she's right there! Don't you see her?!
But my favorite pic of the day has to be the one where my little thug actually looks like a thug! A quick talkin' no BS takin' sweep you under the rug and beat you back into that whack-a-mole-hole that you came from thug! Check out her shiner!
JUST KIDDING!!!!!! It's just the way the pic looked when I took it!!!
Oh wait...here's my favorite of the day...
We have toys. We have boxes. We have games. We have tupperware. We have dolls. We have...
TACO SHELLS!
Yes, this took up about 15 minutes of time today. Conversation?
Avery: Where's ears?
Me: (now keep in mind that when I turned around to see this for the first time, that I had no clue what she was up to. Yes, I leave her on the counter unattended. Judge me later). Yes, Avery...HOLY COW!!!! Look at those taco ears!!!!!!!!!!
Avery: HEHEHE. Where's ears?!?!
Me: I don't know! Where did your ears go? What's there now?!
Avery: I no no! HEHEHE
Me: Gee, they sure look like tasty ears!
Avery:(removing tacos) Dere dey are!!!!
Me: Aw, yay! There's your ears!!!!! Awesome!
Avery: (putting tacos back) Where's ears?!
Me: I dont' know but I'm so biting one of those tacos NOW!!!! (Lunging at her and crunching on one of the taco shells, eliciting extreme laughter from you know who!)
So then it was bath time. It took forever to get Morgan's hair, which was knotted and dread locked because I never brush it because it's impossible and she screams bloody murder and hits me and cries for hours and I just have to rip all of the hair out because there's fuzz in it which makes the knots worse...you get the picture, pulled laterally to remove some of the knots because no comb in the world could battle this one...
Finding the linked hair, I'd have to pull, pull, left to right, repeatedly, working it apart as much as I could. For the most part she let me do it, but every now and then she'd feel a snag and turn all devil on me - MOMMY!!!!!!????? Ow!!!!! Stop! You hurtin' me! You said just a little bit and that hurts!
In my heart I feel badly, but what can I do!??! I have to get this junk out. So I lie.
Me: I'm almost done. (yeah, right)
Morgan: yeah?
Me: Yeah. no worries. Just hang on. Besides, you brush mommy's hair all the time and I don't cry. So don't cry....it'll be
Morgan: OOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Me: Sorry!!!! Sorry!
Morgan: (With tears streaming down her face a bit of a booger starting to show in her left nostril, which means the right nostril ain't far behind...) You hurtin' me!!!!! STOP!!!!!!
Me: Oh, just deal with it. (Brush, brush brush)
Then Morgan got all dressed up in her Cinderella gear and finally introduced that movie to Avery! Sorry the pic is dark. She was on the slide, fingers in mouth, staring at the screen!
But this is where things start to go downhill. I'll do my best to explain the images you're about to see. First, I'm sitting in front of Avery watching Cinderella. She's leaning full body on my back, finger brushing my hair. Sometimes it's okay. Sometimes it hurts. What you are about to see is me holding my phone camera up, hoping that I get the right angle. Even in pain.
Peek-a-boo. She thinks she's being funny looking over at the camera and pulling my hair backwards, effectively dragging me back into the chair with full force. I don't know why she likes getting smushed, but whatever.
Here she is pulling my hair. It was clear, so yay. Notice that she's still watching Cinderella and relying on sheer id to yank at my hair. Ow.
This is the part where you're gonna have to realize that the movement is just way too fast for my camera. And that's why the blurry motion is so funny. She's getting immense pleasure out of my pain. And loving it! Plus she looks a little devilish.
Maniacal laughter...
And we end with love for her babies.
And with Mor-ga-loo making fun faces!
No comments:
Post a Comment